I'm finally posting today-sorry it's been a while. I've been helping at Vacation Bible School (VBS) at my church this week every morning. It has been a great experience (hopefully) helping kids to know God better. I know I wouldn't have been able to participate like this if I was still working, so I'm grateful I can be there.
As awesome as this whole experience is, it also wore me (and my kids) out! Which meant my kids have been a little bit "owly" in the afternoon/evening time lately. Tonight in particular was interesting-as my hubby and I were breathing a sigh of relief (and contemplating our "yippee the kids are in bed!" cocktail") my daughter felt the need to get out of bed and come holler that her little brother is out of bed. Ugh!
I wouldn't trade this week for the world, though. A high point for me was yesterday.... (dramatic pause).... I turned 35! It was a great day (ornery kids and all). After VBS (where some of the kids made me a special necklace AND I got flowers from my niece and nephews) and a quick lunch, we went to my favorite park for a spell (yep, I'm bringin' it back-it's a cute expression). Then we headed to our favorite ice cream parlor, headed back home, had some pizza and I got dolled up to spend some time with my sister and mother and crew.
As I looked in the mirror (all the while hubby was trying to get the rapscallions to bed-haha!) I liked what I saw. Yes, I wish my waistline is a little smaller-I won't be wearing any bikinis any time soon, or ever for that matter... But my skin is (fairly) clear, my face has a "sun-kissed" look to it, which is so nice, because it means I can get by with little to no makeup. This is the most sun I have been able to get in years-when I was working I just couldn't find enough time to get outside-now we're out every day we can. With time flying by like it is, I'm so glad that I can take some time to be with my kids.
PS & FYI-we signed our refinance papers today. We were able to bring our monthly mortgage payment down by over $120. Calculate that by 30 years and it makes a HUGE difference. Mortgage rates are starting to creep up, but they are still much lower than they were a few years ago, so if you're in the position to refi & haven't yet-it's something to think about.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Monday, June 8, 2009
Beneath the Midwestern Moon
My post title is my little homage to Frances Mayes' book, "Under the Tuscan Sun". A story I read a decade ago as I was nearing a huge change in my life-matrimony. A coworker had lent it to me, as she had heard we were going to Italy on our honeymoon. I read the book, enjoyed it, perused the recipes that were also included in the book, but gave it back without cooking a single one (I wasn't even a newlywed yet, so most of our meals were mac'n'cheese.) I really hadn't thought about the book in years-the last time being when a movie came out and was actually released on video-hubby and I watched it and I enjoyed it, but had a hard time getting past some major differences between the movie and book (a struggle I often have).
Recently the movie was playing on one of our extended cable channels, so I recorded it-a good late evening entertainment when there isn't anything on. Watching the movie again reminded me of how much I liked the book. I told my hubby that if I could find it second hand I was going to buy it and THIS TIME I was going to cook some of those delicious recipes included. A few days later the kids and I were perusing the local Goodwill store as a timekiller (1st week of no school and a rainy forecast) and what do I find, but Under the Tuscan Sun! I snatched it up like it was a rare piece of jewelry. What a find!
I also on impulse bought a book circa the 70's about running a household-it's been actually fun reading about quick clean-ups involving emptying your ashtrays first and looking our best for hubby when he gets home. I think the best part about that book was a vintage postcard of a Florida hotel circa 60's or 70's-it's so fun to look at and just wonder-is it still there? Who went there and who was the postcard meant for (unfortunately it was never filled out or mailed)?
All of this nostalgia, along with re-reading a favorite from 10 years ago (my how my life has changed!), plus the fact that I will be turning 35 in less than two weeks has put me in some sort of state of "walking down memory lane". Today I dug out a sort of journal that my Grandmother filled out for me about her life when I was not much older than my daughter is today-I haven't looked at it in a few years, so it was very cool to get re-acquainted with it and my Grandma in turn. I'm planning on sharing it with my daughter very soon as she already adores her great grandmother, and would love to know more about her.
The previously mentioned postcard has put me on a mission-I have a plain wood tray in my family room sitting on an end table. The postcard inspired me to mod podge more postcards to the tray, then cover with a shellac to finish. I started my hunt for more postcards Friday, a local rummage sale listing advertised Antique postcards. I went with my two and somehow managed to lightly skim the full container of cards to find five to take home with a toddler on my hip for the duration. That evening as I was showing hubby my finds-he found the most exciting surprise about my new purchases. two of the cards had one cent stamps on them, and one of these had a postmark of the year 1908-THESE POSTCARDS WERE OVER 100 YEARS OLD! Obviously, those two are not going to be shellacked. I keep reading the messages on them over and over as if I'm peering into their soul-who were these people (sender and sendee)? Friends? Lovers? I can only guess... I do know one thing... I may have a new hobby.
Recently the movie was playing on one of our extended cable channels, so I recorded it-a good late evening entertainment when there isn't anything on. Watching the movie again reminded me of how much I liked the book. I told my hubby that if I could find it second hand I was going to buy it and THIS TIME I was going to cook some of those delicious recipes included. A few days later the kids and I were perusing the local Goodwill store as a timekiller (1st week of no school and a rainy forecast) and what do I find, but Under the Tuscan Sun! I snatched it up like it was a rare piece of jewelry. What a find!
I also on impulse bought a book circa the 70's about running a household-it's been actually fun reading about quick clean-ups involving emptying your ashtrays first and looking our best for hubby when he gets home. I think the best part about that book was a vintage postcard of a Florida hotel circa 60's or 70's-it's so fun to look at and just wonder-is it still there? Who went there and who was the postcard meant for (unfortunately it was never filled out or mailed)?
All of this nostalgia, along with re-reading a favorite from 10 years ago (my how my life has changed!), plus the fact that I will be turning 35 in less than two weeks has put me in some sort of state of "walking down memory lane". Today I dug out a sort of journal that my Grandmother filled out for me about her life when I was not much older than my daughter is today-I haven't looked at it in a few years, so it was very cool to get re-acquainted with it and my Grandma in turn. I'm planning on sharing it with my daughter very soon as she already adores her great grandmother, and would love to know more about her.
The previously mentioned postcard has put me on a mission-I have a plain wood tray in my family room sitting on an end table. The postcard inspired me to mod podge more postcards to the tray, then cover with a shellac to finish. I started my hunt for more postcards Friday, a local rummage sale listing advertised Antique postcards. I went with my two and somehow managed to lightly skim the full container of cards to find five to take home with a toddler on my hip for the duration. That evening as I was showing hubby my finds-he found the most exciting surprise about my new purchases. two of the cards had one cent stamps on them, and one of these had a postmark of the year 1908-THESE POSTCARDS WERE OVER 100 YEARS OLD! Obviously, those two are not going to be shellacked. I keep reading the messages on them over and over as if I'm peering into their soul-who were these people (sender and sendee)? Friends? Lovers? I can only guess... I do know one thing... I may have a new hobby.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Good ol' hospitality
I'd like to talk a little bit about the seemingly dying art of hospitality (and graciousness to boot). The general definition of hospitality pertains mostly to kind and courteous treatment of guests and/or strangers, but to me it means a little something more. My southern belle neighbor definitely knows a little bit about this custom and has inspired me to pass it on...
She asked me to feed her fish and cat and water her garden while she and her family were visiting with relatives in Tennessee. I gladly agreed-they live just two doors down, so it's a pretty easy job-plus my little guy has actually enjoyed "helping" in the task. My first day of our "tasks" I noticed a package and a card on her dining room table with my name on it. Wouldn't you know it, she left me two loaves of homemade bread, a small painting of her husband's doing that I had been eyeing for months, a craft toy & summer toy for the kids along with a homemade card with a beautiful photograph on the front. All this for so little work? At first I was shocked, but then it sunk in... This is just like her-so giving, so caring, so kind. I am truly blessed to have this woman in my life as though she is (a teensy bit) younger than me, she is a great inspiration to me. That evening I made a small batch of chocolate caramel brownies to give to other neighbor/friends (have I mentioned how much I love our neighborhood?) that were kind enough to watch our little guy during my Grandmother's funeral the previous weekend. Pay it forward, right?
As much as I love my neighborhood, I think it has been going through some growing pains lately. We have new neighbors, that seem to have a different type of parenting style than the rest of the neighborhood. It seems pretty much like it's just let the kids run around all day without knowing where they are or what they're doing, followed by intense yelling. Many times we have had several children from this family (I think the Mommy babysits her nieces and nephews) pushing my kids out of the way to climb on my swing set without even asking if they may. We are trying to have a firm yet kind stand on this subject, so it's pretty much the rule now that you MUST ask first, and if you push, hit, swear or do anything else inappropriate, you have to go home. We are trying to give as much attention and praise (for positive behavior) as possible, as these children just seem to eat it up like they're starved for it. We are praying every night to find a way to make a difference.
On Sunday I feel my hospitality was put to the test with one of the little boys. He came over while my hubby, kids and I were out playing on the swing set. To look at him made me cringe a little as he had dirt caked all over his face and (I think) boogies hanging from his nose. He asked very politely if he could swing, and of course we said yes. One of our rules is that no kids may be on our swing set while no adults are supervising-at this point that was no problem as we were all out. However, I knew I needed to get down to the neighbors and water her plants, so I mentioned it to hubby. Half an hour later hubby said he was going to take my kids over to visit another neighbor, but neighbor boy wanted to swing a little longer. So, even though every part of me was itching to get my "jobs" done while my children were off and occupied with their Daddy, I stayed and talked with the little guy. I answered a lot of questions for him-like "What is sand?" and "What are seasons?" I felt like a bond was growing with this little guy and I no longer saw the dirt on his face, I saw an adorable little boy who is dying for attention and affection. After half an hour of chatting I decided I better get moving before suppertime, so I walked him home hand in hand. He wanted to ride a big wheel on his sidewalk and he said "Will you stay and watch me?" How could I resist? I told him I'd stay for just a few minutes more and watch him, but then I needed to get my jobs done. He rode down the block, turning back every few feet to make sure I was still there-I waved and smiled my best smile (the one I smile when my kids do amazing things) for him every time, and every time he smiled a huge smile and waved back. After a few minutes, I said goodbye and promised that as soon as my "jobs" were done, I'd come back and wave at him. I just felt like the kid might do well with having some promises kept (not that I know his parents or whether they keep promises, it's just the vibe I was getting from him). I came back and waved, and a few minutes later he was back at my swing set playing with my returned family. Not much later he was being yelled for and he had to go home (perhaps he didn't let them know he was leaving-even though I asked if he had?). He looked up at me and said "Will you PLEASE walk me home?" So, once again, hand in had we walked to his back path and he raced off to his house. I realized I was feeling pangs similar to the ones I felt when my daughter started school. I'm just so glad to know that kid, and I look forward to the opportunity to get to know him and the rest of the kids in his family better throughout the summer. What was looking like a dreary neighborhood forecast (and could still be-but I'm not paying it mind) for this summer is now looking like a silver lining-we can make a difference in a child's life.
She asked me to feed her fish and cat and water her garden while she and her family were visiting with relatives in Tennessee. I gladly agreed-they live just two doors down, so it's a pretty easy job-plus my little guy has actually enjoyed "helping" in the task. My first day of our "tasks" I noticed a package and a card on her dining room table with my name on it. Wouldn't you know it, she left me two loaves of homemade bread, a small painting of her husband's doing that I had been eyeing for months, a craft toy & summer toy for the kids along with a homemade card with a beautiful photograph on the front. All this for so little work? At first I was shocked, but then it sunk in... This is just like her-so giving, so caring, so kind. I am truly blessed to have this woman in my life as though she is (a teensy bit) younger than me, she is a great inspiration to me. That evening I made a small batch of chocolate caramel brownies to give to other neighbor/friends (have I mentioned how much I love our neighborhood?) that were kind enough to watch our little guy during my Grandmother's funeral the previous weekend. Pay it forward, right?
As much as I love my neighborhood, I think it has been going through some growing pains lately. We have new neighbors, that seem to have a different type of parenting style than the rest of the neighborhood. It seems pretty much like it's just let the kids run around all day without knowing where they are or what they're doing, followed by intense yelling. Many times we have had several children from this family (I think the Mommy babysits her nieces and nephews) pushing my kids out of the way to climb on my swing set without even asking if they may. We are trying to have a firm yet kind stand on this subject, so it's pretty much the rule now that you MUST ask first, and if you push, hit, swear or do anything else inappropriate, you have to go home. We are trying to give as much attention and praise (for positive behavior) as possible, as these children just seem to eat it up like they're starved for it. We are praying every night to find a way to make a difference.
On Sunday I feel my hospitality was put to the test with one of the little boys. He came over while my hubby, kids and I were out playing on the swing set. To look at him made me cringe a little as he had dirt caked all over his face and (I think) boogies hanging from his nose. He asked very politely if he could swing, and of course we said yes. One of our rules is that no kids may be on our swing set while no adults are supervising-at this point that was no problem as we were all out. However, I knew I needed to get down to the neighbors and water her plants, so I mentioned it to hubby. Half an hour later hubby said he was going to take my kids over to visit another neighbor, but neighbor boy wanted to swing a little longer. So, even though every part of me was itching to get my "jobs" done while my children were off and occupied with their Daddy, I stayed and talked with the little guy. I answered a lot of questions for him-like "What is sand?" and "What are seasons?" I felt like a bond was growing with this little guy and I no longer saw the dirt on his face, I saw an adorable little boy who is dying for attention and affection. After half an hour of chatting I decided I better get moving before suppertime, so I walked him home hand in hand. He wanted to ride a big wheel on his sidewalk and he said "Will you stay and watch me?" How could I resist? I told him I'd stay for just a few minutes more and watch him, but then I needed to get my jobs done. He rode down the block, turning back every few feet to make sure I was still there-I waved and smiled my best smile (the one I smile when my kids do amazing things) for him every time, and every time he smiled a huge smile and waved back. After a few minutes, I said goodbye and promised that as soon as my "jobs" were done, I'd come back and wave at him. I just felt like the kid might do well with having some promises kept (not that I know his parents or whether they keep promises, it's just the vibe I was getting from him). I came back and waved, and a few minutes later he was back at my swing set playing with my returned family. Not much later he was being yelled for and he had to go home (perhaps he didn't let them know he was leaving-even though I asked if he had?). He looked up at me and said "Will you PLEASE walk me home?" So, once again, hand in had we walked to his back path and he raced off to his house. I realized I was feeling pangs similar to the ones I felt when my daughter started school. I'm just so glad to know that kid, and I look forward to the opportunity to get to know him and the rest of the kids in his family better throughout the summer. What was looking like a dreary neighborhood forecast (and could still be-but I'm not paying it mind) for this summer is now looking like a silver lining-we can make a difference in a child's life.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Gray hairs galore.
I think my son is trying to give me about a zillion gray hairs. He is so fearless that I have assumed all of the fear myself and then some. I already mentioned how he chased a bird last week. Well since then he has also woken up before everyone else in the family, gone down to the kitchen gotten a strawberry and a knife to cut the stem off (since that's what Mommy always does). My hubby heard some scuffling, and found him with the knife on our couch "stabbing" it (thankfully it wasn't a sharp knife and didn't break through). Little man was nice enough to point out that it was okay that he was using the knife because it was "a small knife, Dad!".
Ugh-I can feel those gray hairs coming. Plus we're trying to teach him the importance of using our words instead of getting physical, ie: saying "I'm mad." instead of hitting someone. My daughter gave us a few scares at this age, but he has given us more scares in one week than I think she ever has given us! I know every child is different, and I love his moxie, but he is driving his Momma up the wall! I am watching him like a hawk, but he still manages to climb on everything and anything in his reach. I am SO happy that he is sleeping now so that I can relax (a little!). I think I'm going to go sit down with a (much deserved) glass of wine. I've attached a video of the kids at the park-notice how after the car honks, little guy looks back at Sis and then hits her with the stick. See why I'm getting gray?
Ugh-I can feel those gray hairs coming. Plus we're trying to teach him the importance of using our words instead of getting physical, ie: saying "I'm mad." instead of hitting someone. My daughter gave us a few scares at this age, but he has given us more scares in one week than I think she ever has given us! I know every child is different, and I love his moxie, but he is driving his Momma up the wall! I am watching him like a hawk, but he still manages to climb on everything and anything in his reach. I am SO happy that he is sleeping now so that I can relax (a little!). I think I'm going to go sit down with a (much deserved) glass of wine. I've attached a video of the kids at the park-notice how after the car honks, little guy looks back at Sis and then hits her with the stick. See why I'm getting gray?
Friday, May 22, 2009
Week's End Update
Hello Strangers! Sorry that it's taken me so long to post, it just has been a VERY long week. Let me give a quick rundown of the most memorable moments, and I'm off to be with family (you'll understand better in a moment)
1. I lost my little guy on Tuesday-we were outside painting, he was going toward the front of our house and I went to set down my paint roller to go get him-then he was gone. I cannot explain the gut wrenching feeling that overtook me. I searched frantically in the nearby yards, neighbors, and called my sister as I knew she was nearby also. Then, like a miracle he was there he told me that he was "chasing a bird" Little man was followed by a guardian angel-a senior man from one block down was following him and very forcefully reminded me of how bad I mother I was to lose my child. I didn't need any reminding-I felt like the worst mother in the whole world. Now I know what those mothers mean when they say "I just turned around for a minute." I still hyperventilate thinking about it now. I know a couple of very important things now- Junior is now not afraid to leave our yard or cross the street-so as they say in one of the Harry Potter books "CONSTANT VIGILANCE!" (not that I was letting him run willy nilly before, but he's fearless and the next point is:) , little man is MUCH faster than I ever gave him credit for. I have never had this happen with my daughter (she's too pokey), so it's a new experience that I hope I NEVER have to go through again.
2. I got to chaperone at my daughter's school field trip-that was a fun experience, and I didn't lose a single child (seriously, I was on those poor seven year olds like flies on honey-they might have felt a little smothered, but too bad.) My girl said that it was the "best field trip ever". I 'd like to think that part of that was because I was able to go-if I was working that might not have been the case.
3. My grandmother passed away early yesterday. It's so hard to see my mother having to let go of her mother. She just stopped by and seems to be holding up well, but of course I worry-she's my mom. We are taking the kids over to her place for dinner tonight (one of her friends provided a big pot of sloppy joes and all the fixin's)-so I'm looking forward to getting to spend some more time with her. I wish I would have spent more time with my grandmother-I feel like I don't know who she was very well-that's probably what's the hardest for me.
Well, that's the three major bullet points of my week in random order-obviously I've had some frayed nerves and with the visitation/funeral happening tomorrow, there will be more to come. If you pray, say a little one for my family?
1. I lost my little guy on Tuesday-we were outside painting, he was going toward the front of our house and I went to set down my paint roller to go get him-then he was gone. I cannot explain the gut wrenching feeling that overtook me. I searched frantically in the nearby yards, neighbors, and called my sister as I knew she was nearby also. Then, like a miracle he was there he told me that he was "chasing a bird" Little man was followed by a guardian angel-a senior man from one block down was following him and very forcefully reminded me of how bad I mother I was to lose my child. I didn't need any reminding-I felt like the worst mother in the whole world. Now I know what those mothers mean when they say "I just turned around for a minute." I still hyperventilate thinking about it now. I know a couple of very important things now- Junior is now not afraid to leave our yard or cross the street-so as they say in one of the Harry Potter books "CONSTANT VIGILANCE!" (not that I was letting him run willy nilly before, but he's fearless and the next point is:) , little man is MUCH faster than I ever gave him credit for. I have never had this happen with my daughter (she's too pokey), so it's a new experience that I hope I NEVER have to go through again.
2. I got to chaperone at my daughter's school field trip-that was a fun experience, and I didn't lose a single child (seriously, I was on those poor seven year olds like flies on honey-they might have felt a little smothered, but too bad.) My girl said that it was the "best field trip ever". I 'd like to think that part of that was because I was able to go-if I was working that might not have been the case.
3. My grandmother passed away early yesterday. It's so hard to see my mother having to let go of her mother. She just stopped by and seems to be holding up well, but of course I worry-she's my mom. We are taking the kids over to her place for dinner tonight (one of her friends provided a big pot of sloppy joes and all the fixin's)-so I'm looking forward to getting to spend some more time with her. I wish I would have spent more time with my grandmother-I feel like I don't know who she was very well-that's probably what's the hardest for me.
Well, that's the three major bullet points of my week in random order-obviously I've had some frayed nerves and with the visitation/funeral happening tomorrow, there will be more to come. If you pray, say a little one for my family?
Thursday, May 14, 2009
What I woke up to this morning.
Apparently the little guy was more alert this morning than the rest of the family. When our alarm went off (and my hubby hit the snooze like usual) I settled back in for our "Five more". I was just starting to drift off when I heard some noises coming from down in our dining room... Uh oh. On a school day (and really most days) this is NOT a welcoming sound. It means that either my seven year old woke up and decided to make breakfast for everyone instead of getting dressed and making her bed like she's supposed to do on school days OR the little rascal is foraging!
I made it down the stairs in double time to find him sitting at the dining room table with a cup with hot cocoa mix in it, dipping his fingers in it and also, a carton of ice cream (thankfully nearly empty to begin with). Of course he had chocolate all over his face! At least he had his dairy group. I think what cracked me up the most was that he was eating his ice cream with a miniature child's whisk.
It was definitely a way to wake up-not necessarily good, but a way. I actually had a hard time hiding my giggles while hubby explained to little guy why ice cream and cocoa aren't the best breakfast choices. So have a great night-and if you need a pick-me-up in the morning, there's always dry cocoa and ice cream-via whisk!
I made it down the stairs in double time to find him sitting at the dining room table with a cup with hot cocoa mix in it, dipping his fingers in it and also, a carton of ice cream (thankfully nearly empty to begin with). Of course he had chocolate all over his face! At least he had his dairy group. I think what cracked me up the most was that he was eating his ice cream with a miniature child's whisk.
It was definitely a way to wake up-not necessarily good, but a way. I actually had a hard time hiding my giggles while hubby explained to little guy why ice cream and cocoa aren't the best breakfast choices. So have a great night-and if you need a pick-me-up in the morning, there's always dry cocoa and ice cream-via whisk!
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Rollercoaster of life.
Happy Mother's day to all the Momma's out there. I hope it was a good one for everyone. I've had kind of a crazy/weird/sad/busy week. Let me see if I can bring everyone up to speed.
First off, my Grandmother is in the hospital not doing well, they've called in Hospice. If anyone has lost a loved one, they might know what calling in Hospice means.. I visited her shortly yesterday morning and she was in a lot of pain at the time. It's very sad to watch this going on-I wasn't closest with my Grandmother, but I love her, and I hate seeing my Mother go through losing her Mother. Umm.... Not going to talk anymore about that right now, it makes me too sad..
On a bright note, my sister, my nephew and I had an interview with a reporter from the local paper about our Walk Now for Autism-happening this upcoming Saturday in Chicago. The article is set to print tomorrow, so I'm anxious to see how it turns out.
Another shining point in my week was taking my daughter to our church's Mother Daughter Banquet. This year the entertainment was a Talent Show. My daughter was slated to sing while her cousin played piano. She had been very nervous when she was first asked to perform, so I told her I would do something for the talent show, also. So, I've been practicing for weeks on my guitar. The big night was Friday, and I performed "Yellow" by Coldplay, a song that I have sung to my dear girl since she was just a somersaulter in my tummy. I admit that I messed up, but I kept going-and I was so proud to show my girl that it's okay to get out of your comfort zone and keep going. I was quite proud of my little singer, too-both the girls did a great job!
Today was another crazy day as my girl and her cousin hosted a bake sale after church to raise funds for our walk. Also, I was liturgist for the first time ever-talk about being out of my comfort zone this week! After church we had a quick lunch, then headed to one of our favorite parks to attempt a hike-I was actually surprised-the little guy handled it fairly well-though the hubby did have to carry him some. Everyone in our family was tired and a little cranky tonight, so it was early bedtime for everyone (apparently even hubby-he was snoring away while I watched a "chick flick").
While I sat in bed trying to read, then thinking about sleeping, but not even trying because I know it's not going to come to me right now, I just feel so jumbled with my emotions. I don't know whether I'm happy or sad. Why does life (and death) have to be so complicated-our emotions get to jumbled.... I'm usually the type of gal that wears her heart on her sleeve-you can usually tell exactly what I feel. Right this moment I'm just feeling alone. The house is too quiet (other than the snores). I'm almost contemplating waking hubby up, just so I can have a good listener to hear me.. Or even just his arms to hold me. I shouldn't wake him, but it IS still officially Mothers day for another 20 minutes, AND he failed to give me the one gift I asked him for (just to fix an old palm pilot of his that I like to play games on)-just plain forgot... We'll see, I might just have vented enough now to fall asleep on my own.
Anyways, hug your Mommas-they're precious commodities, and we're blessed to have them.
First off, my Grandmother is in the hospital not doing well, they've called in Hospice. If anyone has lost a loved one, they might know what calling in Hospice means.. I visited her shortly yesterday morning and she was in a lot of pain at the time. It's very sad to watch this going on-I wasn't closest with my Grandmother, but I love her, and I hate seeing my Mother go through losing her Mother. Umm.... Not going to talk anymore about that right now, it makes me too sad..
On a bright note, my sister, my nephew and I had an interview with a reporter from the local paper about our Walk Now for Autism-happening this upcoming Saturday in Chicago. The article is set to print tomorrow, so I'm anxious to see how it turns out.
Another shining point in my week was taking my daughter to our church's Mother Daughter Banquet. This year the entertainment was a Talent Show. My daughter was slated to sing while her cousin played piano. She had been very nervous when she was first asked to perform, so I told her I would do something for the talent show, also. So, I've been practicing for weeks on my guitar. The big night was Friday, and I performed "Yellow" by Coldplay, a song that I have sung to my dear girl since she was just a somersaulter in my tummy. I admit that I messed up, but I kept going-and I was so proud to show my girl that it's okay to get out of your comfort zone and keep going. I was quite proud of my little singer, too-both the girls did a great job!
Today was another crazy day as my girl and her cousin hosted a bake sale after church to raise funds for our walk. Also, I was liturgist for the first time ever-talk about being out of my comfort zone this week! After church we had a quick lunch, then headed to one of our favorite parks to attempt a hike-I was actually surprised-the little guy handled it fairly well-though the hubby did have to carry him some. Everyone in our family was tired and a little cranky tonight, so it was early bedtime for everyone (apparently even hubby-he was snoring away while I watched a "chick flick").
While I sat in bed trying to read, then thinking about sleeping, but not even trying because I know it's not going to come to me right now, I just feel so jumbled with my emotions. I don't know whether I'm happy or sad. Why does life (and death) have to be so complicated-our emotions get to jumbled.... I'm usually the type of gal that wears her heart on her sleeve-you can usually tell exactly what I feel. Right this moment I'm just feeling alone. The house is too quiet (other than the snores). I'm almost contemplating waking hubby up, just so I can have a good listener to hear me.. Or even just his arms to hold me. I shouldn't wake him, but it IS still officially Mothers day for another 20 minutes, AND he failed to give me the one gift I asked him for (just to fix an old palm pilot of his that I like to play games on)-just plain forgot... We'll see, I might just have vented enough now to fall asleep on my own.
Anyways, hug your Mommas-they're precious commodities, and we're blessed to have them.
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