Why is it that when life starts to just get comfortable, things get turned upside down all over again?? Sometimes I think of life as a moss covered hiking trail-sometimes when we're climbing up we slip down and sometimes when we're sliding down we find a rock and catch ourselves and are able to right ourselves again. (All through the grace of God in my opinion).
I was comfortable a year ago in my old job as a title closer. I had been there over seven years, made decent enough money working 3 days a week and LOVED the peopled I worked with. Then I was laid off.... "slip sliding away" as Paul Simon says. I thought "This is it-the hard times that I KNEW would come at some point." But guess what?? We adjusted. I adjusted-adapted. I cut coupons and looked for sales. We made some sacrifices, but way fewer than I expected. I thrived in my new role as Mom at home. (Don't get me wrong, there were tough days, but there are on every job).
Then I got a phone call from an old contact-an attorney had a secretary who was expecting, he needed help during her maternity leave... I stepped in to help for the 7 weeks time. I have been working 4 days a week-the schedule has been tough-I haven't been able to meet the standards that I set for myself when I was home all the time-baking my own bread, a better organized more deeply cleaned house.
When I got hired for this job I thought I'd do my time, get done with 7 weeks and be home again. Fortunately or unfortunately, I have grown to really like the bosses and coworkers here. Sometimes the clients and cases are hard for me to face or know about (you can guess some of the types of clients attorneys have-it's not all sunshine and daisies). In fact, my first week I cried a few times, both over missing my little guy and just the sadness of knowing there is some bad stuff happening out there.
As I mentioned, I like the people I work with... One of the attorneys has been asking me to stay on after my time is up. It has been fairly easy to quickly respond with "I'm very honored, but no thank you, I need to be with my family right now." It has almost become a game-he knows how I'll answer, yet he keeps trying.... Well, Friday he said "You know you just need to come in and work one or two days a week so that you can keep in touch with all of us and what is going on-all the sordid details." (he like me is a "wordy" and likes to articulate-someone I've been enjoying bantering with).
So, now I'm slip sliding again-do I stay or do I go? Will it kill my kids to miss me one day a week? Will it kill me??? I don't think so. I think I know what I want to do-but would love any comments regarding this decision.